single's day

LoLz~while i was thinking, wat title should i put for this time??recently i recalled back alot of things..among tat, there is half of it is about relationship..haha...tats y my title is single's day...wah..almost 1 year d my single day...actually i m not suitable to said tat my single day is more than others..as the ppl i know..there is alot of them..their single's life longer than me..like today..while i was talking with my friend outside his room..we talked about relationship with gals..he said," steve, u no need to worry la..u so handsome, sure can get alot of gals if u wan.."(be frank, this is truely, really from my friend but not me=.=)but for me, i don really think it..cos i know, i m not as good as he think, i got alot and alot of weaknesses..alot of things happened to let me cant let it go.. Got a friend from my hometown..she said, " steve, i hope u can let both of my friends go...." frankly, i don like to misunderstand wat she think, so i din think about wat is the meaning of her words to me..but actually i know the " both of my friends " is who..i clear about it.. in this single's day..i do really feel tat wat is the feeling of alone.. i don like to mix up with the ppl tat i don like, maybe u can say me LANCI..but, this is me..i dono y, i really rather to alone if i need to go out or chatting with the ppl tat i donlike..i admit tat, i m not a ppl tat everyone welcome..cos if i donlike somebody, i will write on my face..haha..really thxful to God..he gives me alot of good friends in this college(of course also got bad too..XD)i give them good, meaning i can talk my secret to them, share with them, they will mentally support me(stil the same until now..hope future will be too)maybe this is wat good friend means, honestly, i do not have this kind of friend at last time, my friends in college really teman me alot in my single day, thx alot...if somethings tat should be forgotten, forget it...to make urself wont be feel so suffer..is very struggle..i face it..but i cant solve it..don ask me y..cos i really got no the strength to solve it..don worry..after this week i will went back my hometown for 1 week ++, so tat time u wont see me and u wont be unhappy( maybe=P)..actually maybe someone read this blog, u might not really understand wat i trying to said, but frankly, i also dono wat m i writing now..p/s..i m the person who never get things back if i give it out, once i give it out, it is no longer belong to me, don try to give me back, it is consider no respect me, i will angry..thx..(moody, headache)

Weekend Holiday

Last week..after i finished my project..(actually is a stupid bench work=P)..i went back to my hometown for 3 purposes,1)teman my family,2)attend my church family camp,3)to see someone..ya..i done all my 3 purposes,but with sad and bad feeling..first of all,i very happy while i m doing this 3 purposes..teman my family go eat dinner and breakfast, having some great time with my mum and my sister..in the family camp,i do really happy and have a great time with my brother sisters, and my pastors..i talked alot b4 i sleep in my chalet..and my bro pray for me..is great!he is going to face his most important problem in this December, which he is going to marry!i do really happy to heard this news..as i know, he is a very responsibility people,and he will treat his wife as good as he can..really jealous!tat night we really talked alot..he said many things to me..and he pray for me..in his prayers..he hope tat God will lead me to a gal..LOL!ya, really..i trusted God..He will lead me..and also my pastor..he asked me.."u got so many time in kl,do u take the time and go tackle gal?"i said,"i m not as good as u know,so i din go tackle gal"..he said,"good good,God will lead u"...my church got so many guys,like my age,y only ask me..swt la..haha..tat day,while i m driving back to bm,(forgot to say tat the family camp is in Sungai Petani)im with sad mood,is not the camp make me feel sad,but is ur eye contact with him,really really broke my heart..actually i shouldn't said in this way..cos u are just my FRIEND, and friend got no this right to jealous or to break heart..haha..dono y,i fully understand wat friend's mean..but i cant..really..sry to said tat..as a 3rd person..i can feel tat u are still like him but u just ignore ur feeling and said both of u are friend..finally..the night, i sent a msg to u,and i told u tat u really need to teman him cos he is going back to his hometown..pls..be true to urself..this is the words tat u told me b4..izit?HAHAHAHA...i really think too much d..good nite,and GOD bless...

1 month at my college d~.~

haiz..i dono whether is God playing with me or really my beloved one not yet come out..everytime wen i have some good feeling with a gal..the gal sure got bf or something else such as she is going to study at oversea and etc..i think i m the bad luck people..this week is the 5th weeks and also the 3rd subjects tat i going to cover it..this subject are really really BORED!!LOL...so sad..n i was having a bad headache and fever..i really hope there is a ppl who concern me and make me feel better..(other than doctor la...=p)maybe i shouldnt rush..but..i really desperate..dono y..and i think tat i m affair and i lost the passion to start a new relationship with new ppl..a funny story here..a gal in my college..it is a only 1 actually= =..last few day after i finished my basketball game..me and my friends sit together and talking crap..suddenly they mentioned about the gal..she named eline..this is the following conversation.........."steve, eline is not bad wat..y u dowan to have her as ur gf?" and i said.."u all know she got bf d..y stil ask me to go and chase her?i seems like to be a 3rd ppl between a relationship...." they said,"steve, now the world change alrdy..u should fight for ur own but not thinking for others..if u care for others, who is gonna to care for u??" and i answered, "she is a kl ppl and she got bf d..now she is having a good relationship,if u all ask me to be 3rd ppl and break other ppl's relationship..is cruel..some more..i m agree that i really have a good impression to her..but since she got bf d..y don just hope she will happy?"den my friends all scold me stupid,stupiak la...haha~by the way..love a ppl doesnt means must have her/him..yeah right?